Video Critique Number 7

Video Critique Number 7
October 15, 2010 | Melanie Lerner

http://vimeo.com/11743005

<iframe src="http://player.vimeo.com/video/11743005" width="400" height="300" frameborder="0"></iframe><p><a href="http://vimeo.com/11743005">Pan Ector Industries</a> from <a href="http://vimeo.com/cdes">Communication Design at UNT</a> on <a href="http://vimeo.com">Vimeo</a>.</p>

Title: Pan Ector Industries

47 seconds

This piece demonstrates the proper sequence when screen printing for a company and the ways to go about producing a shirt. The concept centers on the fact that there are many options, but in general, there is a logical sequence to follow. The way the illustrations appear on screen resembles the workings of a slot machine. I’m not entirely sure of the connection but I think the artist was trying to show that making a shirt, like playing slots, involve many choices, and until the very end you never know which one you will end up with.

The video contains a nice sense of unity, a tasteful color palette, and design language that is simple and easy to understand. The jargon is in fact very good: casual and catchy. The hierarchy is clear, the typefaces chosen are legible, and the illustration style is a nice touch. However, over all the video is too dull and unexciting. Pacing is too slow and the transitions are not dynamic enough to retain attention and make the work memorable. The work needs variety. Things could get changed up a bit from scene to scene so that is not as predictable, but still remain cohesive through consistent type choices, colors, and other treatments. Maybe even some audio could enhance it, be it a voiceover or individual sound effects from time to time (a nice compliment to the music already playing). Nevertheless, the creator did pay fairly good attention to details and the work is aesthetically pleasing. He/she avoided see and say as well.

Some suggestions are: The intro could be strengthened by altering how things reveal themselves instead of just appearing one by one with a simple wipe down on screen.

At 0:02 there could be a zoom in or more focus to highlight the details on the backboard that says “Live Screen Printing $15.” The artist could have taken more liberty to deconstruct this because there are many components in backboard alone to worth with.

At 0:03 it is bizarre how the icons appear on screen by coming up from the bottom and spinning into their respective boxes. It would make more sense to already be spinning and slowly revealing themselves in the actual boxes from the start.

At 0:08 the zoom in to reveal the type leaves the last two letters of the headline still showing which makes for a weird cut off. To remedy this, those two letters shouldn’t be on screen at all (just the paragraph/copy of text that follows). Also, the pacing here is slow and it doesn’t take that much time to read a few quick lines of copy.

At 0:11 the brown box on the bottom right hand corner flashes for no apparent reason and this treatment is not repeated anywhere else (mistake rather than intentional).

At 0:12 the text is not lined up with the crossbar of the “T.” And at similar screens later on in the presentation alignment issues resurface again (at 0:21 and 0:28 seconds).

At 0:18 the appearance of type doesn’t work (zoom in and expand) and it ends up showing through part of the previous heading.

At 0:37 it would be nice to be able to see the icons animated rather than just remaining stagnant. The t-shirt could be moving and look like it is coming out of a printer. Also, the other icons don’t get the same treatment as the t-shirt (there is no zoom in for them), creating an inconsistency.

At 0:41 the ending is weak. The simple wipe down seems too PowerPoint like. Even the way Pan Ector Industries shows up at 0:44 seconds is too boring. The ending is a time to make a lasting impression and there is none to be found here.